Sunday 16 June 2013

Time keeping

Travelling back from London on Friday was a challenge. I had a meeting at 3.30 after which I had to be on the 4.32 Victoria to Gatwick train to get an EasyJet flight at 6.25.

Having thought I was on a BA flight rather than an EasyJet I had failed to print off my boarding card in advance. Easyjet would be delighted to charge me £90 for printing one off at the airport but I would not be delighted to pay them. I begged a favour from a stranger at my first meeting and had them print my boarding pass for me.

It got worse when I discovered the venue for my 3.30 meeting was nowhere near where I had thought it was. My only hope was to cut the meeting dead at 4.00 and run like the clappers.

The 3.30 meeting started at 3.37. With no small amount of skill and pride I spoke three times more quickly than usual concluding the meeting with a successful outcome on the dot of 3.59. (It is quite possible that I have developed a reputation as a bit of a loony in the process).

I made it to Victoria Station at 4.23 and bagged a seat on the 4.32 to Littlehampton and Bognor Regis. I began to relax - I would have an hour and ten minutes to get through security at Gatwick and get to the gate.

Strolling through the airport and hurtling from the South terminal to the North on the transit I made my way to the departures gate. I handed my boarding pass over and things went wrong.

"This is for tomorrow night sir!"

"WHAT!?"

I hurried to the EasyJet ticket sales desk to be told they could get me on the flight on Friday for £99.

It took a good ten minutes to get the boarding pass and head back to the departures gate, where a queue had formed.

As I waited I examined my boarding pass. The departure time was showing at 6.10 rather than 6.25. I looked for a clock. 5.46.

As is always the case when you are in a hurry the security teams slow down and someone very stupid in front thinks that they have the time to have chat with the security people as they go.

Naturally I got frisked and had to remove my shoes for separate x-ray attention.

Rather less relaxed than I was on the train I hurtled through the airport to Gate 55E which is about as far from security as you can get. The flight was of course delayed! Till 6.25!!

Tuesday 11 June 2013

A plague of WIBINI's

Yesterday was total frustration on the road. Nice empty roads to Newcastle and then Edinburgh except for a  plague of Wibinis.

First there was the bus being towed by the pick up truck for four miles. Then the not so smart- smart car for three miles. Turning round at Newcastle found me behind a caravan behind a tanker behind an articulated lorry behind a camper for about thirty miles. Passed that lot in time for a six mile delay behind a tractor.

All of them Wibinis - "what is behind is not important".




Saturday 8 June 2013

Approval

My approval rating has gone through the roof. Not that I am being approved of.; the increase in my rating is quite sinister.

Mrs Blog often sends me out to our local Sainsburys to get a little shopping. Being technologically aware I have, for some time, being using the self-service check-out.

I know that when I buy alcohol or aspirin (I always seem to buy the two at the same time!), I need to be approved of by a member of staff. This has never been a problem as I am always sober, non-suicidal and wrinkled enough to pass scrutiny.

Today I was buying neither aspirin nor alcohol (despite consuming vast quantities of both in the last 24 hours)  and still needed approval. What for? Firelighters for the barbecue! Bizarrely I do not need approval for the matches!!

Friday 7 June 2013

Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday

This week Mr Blog was visiting Mum-Blog in Yorkshire.There were a series of forms that needed sorting out so, rather cleverly, he pre-prepared the forms ready for signature.

Sister-Blog (Wife of big-fat-Tom-Blog) spotted one or two errors.

It appears that for at least seventeen years the blog-address-book has held that following inaccuracies,
  • Uncle-Blog's address
  • Brother-Blog's post code
  • Mother-Blog's post code
  • Sister-blog (wife of big-fat-Tom-Blog)'s birthday
There may well be many other inaccuracies which have yet to come to light so please bear with us. If you have been expecting a birthday card, Christmas card or any other felicitation from the blogs and did not receive it - sorry!

Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year (Just in case!)