Christmas Misunderstandings

It could be the Christmas drinking, it could be tiredness from too many late nights or it could be just one of those things.....

I said to daughter-blog, "I'll get myself a beer."

She heard, "I'll be celibate."

Blog Christmas 3

Conversation in the Blog house this morning...

"Lovely, the sun is shining!" (Mrs Blog)

"Where?" (Daughter-Blog aged 22)

"In the sky!" Mr Blog

Blog Christmas 2

On Christmas Eve, Daughter-Blog and I had both been put in charge of cooking the Christmas ham. Mrs Blog had already popped it in the oven so all that was needed was to

• Take it out of the oven at the right time
• Stud the ham with cloves 
• Score the skin
• finish it off
• ...and remove the plastic wrapping that it had been cooked in.

Blog Christmas 1

Christmas this year in the Blog household was the usual affair with one or two exceptions it went pretty well.

Christmas evening and the Blogs were sitting down ready to watch whatever exciting programmes or films the TV companies had prepared and discovered there was nothing on. Not to be put off we had Plan B - Talk Talk TV with "on demand" programmes and films. Switching to the requisite channel we then checked out the TV guide for something to watch. White Christmas? Harvey? Something Christmassy? Nope - none of them are available, whilst you can watch on demand you can only watch what the TV companies let you watch and that turned out to be nearly nothing! 

The only programme we could watch on demand was repeated episodes of "Come Dine With Me"! Merry christmas Talk Talk!

Attempted Patricide

Stayed with son-Blog in St Andrews last night.

He offered to cook an omelette for breakfast for the two us. Into it went salami, cheese and, according to him, eggs. Whatever the constituents, it did not result in anything that looked like an omelette.After a timely intervention by the World Health Organisation, I opted for toast.

I can only conclude that despite my devoted paternal ministrations I am a marked man!