In his youth Mr Blog experienced the trauma of not only having to use the outside toilet on visits to Nana-Thewitch-Blog, but also sharing it with countless daddy-long-legs. The loo roll wasn't a loo roll - it was cut up squares of newspaper hung on string on a nail in the wall. Back then, at the age of five, you believed that this is as bad as a loo can get, but as the years passed you find out that you are wrong.
Holidays in France provided further education . "Open to the air troughs in the pavement" surrounded by a cast iron screen provided an introduction to the French disregard for complex sanitation. Later in the trip, the legendary "Footplate" system in France was a revelation. This topped the Mr Blog list of "Toilets never to visit again" until he discovered the communal, unisex, four sets of footplates facing each other model.
Traumatised, Mr Blog vowed never to go to the loo in France for the rest of his life. However, he overlooked the practicality of keeping this vow (in his defence he was only 14 years old). A later trip in his early twenties for three days to Normandy put paid to his toilet-vow when it proved completely unworkable.
Scroll forward to Japan this year and you will appreciate that Mr Blog was a little nervous! He needn't have been...
Japan is a truly global centre of excellence for rest rooms! All of them have heated toilet seats, even the public ones! They are all immaculately clean. They almost all have integral bidets with myriad buttons to operate the strength and direction of water jets.
In one hotel there was a loo where the toilet lid opened automatically as soon as you opened the bathroom door and again, automatically closed when you left. Mr and Mrs Blog spent hours opening and closing the loo door trying to catch it out - a bit like closing the fridge door slowly to see if you can catch the light going out!
Sadly, Japanese loos would be wasted on the French.
PS While writing this post Mr Blog got very immersed and lost track of the time, nearly missing the start of the Lions Vs Wallabies. Having told Mrs Blog of the near disaster she said, "Did you get bogged down?"
PPS Apologies to Sussex-Nephew-George Blog for not spotting his comments! Thank you.
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